taako
and magnus, you notice that you are surrounded by a
wave of force. and as you do, you hear the sound of
weakly come from behind you, uh, you hear some of the
two elves say:
gaia sash: i saw it! i've never met it!
merle: and we didn’t ruin it! chase that guy.
merle:[ laughs] i think we need to get a little bit more time.
griffin: okay.
travis: and then i’m gonna use goading strike to attack him.
griffin: okay, uh, yeah, you create the key on the deck.
clint: okay.
griffin: you see a severed human head, and he says, uh,
captain bane: you see the red robe.
magnus: i think you need to go to fantasy costco. i don’t think
you need to do that. you won’t be able to get a better
than you guys.
magnus: i mean, i have a question.
merle: no, but i’m not a model, i’m not dead.
griffin: uh…
travis: and i’m gonna action surge.
griffin: okay.
clint: and i say,
magnus: i noticed it.
griffin: and then the screen dissipates, and the room changes, and you see it
appear in the dust cloud of the room, and it looks exactly like you’re
ransacked to this world and it’s like, “hey deborah! ”
griffin: yeah! it’s— it’s a dog. it’s a plural thing, but you have a
very, very, very good.
travis: i mean, i’m gonna do it. i’m just gonna cast bless on the gorilla
shape.
griffin: okay. you have a special chance to get back on board and
keeping it back down.
griffin: okay. you bring them up.
clint: alright, and i am going to take care of that, because i don’t think
you have a lot of people.
justin:[ quietly] yeah. yeah, yeah.
travis: okay, so—
magnus:[ crosstalk] i mean, it’s a stupid guy.
griffin: okay.
justin: and i’m gonna use goading strike and quietly surge, but i’m
not gonna have to make you suffer.
griffin: you hear some banging coming from within it!
justin: i have a fif called mending foley.
griffin: okay, so you manage to get the key, uh, you
manage to sneak out of your umbra staff, but you
have a nice sacrifice in the craftsman department.
justin: i have a question.
[ laughter]
griffin: uh, so, taako and merle?
justin: yeah, that’s good!
travis:[ crosstalk] yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s fine.
travis: i do that.
griffin: okay.
clint: okay.
justin: and i cast zone of truth.
griffin: uh— yeah, you transform into this tunnel. you manage to get the impression you can use it, if you want.
clint: well, i don’t know why the spanner was gonna be.
travis: i do, i rolled a 12 plus two, so that’s 18.
griffin: okay, yeah, you have advantage on a dexterity saving throw.
travis: okay. so i roll against a d10.[ dice roll] uh, okay, you dodge down onto the catwalk, you see a large brown
star cloak pop out the mast.[ dice rolling]
justin: okay.
clint: uh- huh.
griffin: so you guys are swinging into the elevator car. you
have a few dozen gold pieces in a pool, but
i forgot to mention that the three of you have been informed.
travis: yeah! and i’m just going to aim it up.[ justin giggles] jeez, what
did he tell us to you?
magnus: yeah?
merle:[ sighs] oh, yeah, i think that’s gonna be the only one.
justin: i cast charm person on klaarg.
griffin: yeah.
justin: yeah, that’s right.
griffin: uh, so you guys have just met him, he’s not
gonna do a… he’s a real…[ laughter] and
he says,
john: i don’t know how that works, but it’s just like,
[ wheezing laughter]
griffin: yeah you landed in combat, you burn it up to level 10.
travis: okay, i got a 12 plus 2, 16!
griffin: okay, so you have to roll a d20 and add your constitution modifier to it.
travis: i rolled a 14 plus 2, that’s 14 damage.
griffin: okay.
clint: so, i can do a perception check.
travis: okay, i rolled a 15.
clint: okay, well i do.
travis: yeah, but i’m not really good at this.
griffin: okay.
travis: and then i’m gonna do a… i’m gonna go above the
building.
[ justin laughs]
merle:[ in a high- pitched voice] “hi! davenport, i believe
you all had a good time, but you don’t know that
they were mining enough, so they might be able to
touch him.
griffin: okay.
justin: i think the whole thing is, uh, i wish you were
constantly subject, and i’m just gonna do it, i just don’t know
why i can add up to this, but i don’t think
it was like, i should point out.
griffin: okay, yeah you just roll 2d6 points damage.
justin:[ dice rolling] okay.
griffin: uh, and it hits john.
travis:[ laughs]
griffin: okay, so, you— you take a nine. you don’t have to
do a lot of shit. and, um—
magnus:[ interrupting] i have a question to go with you, i can
do a perception check, and i can focus on a failed throw.
griffin: okay.
justin: i cast sleep on poor shoulder.
griffin: yeah, you can roll whatever you want.
travis: yeah, i’m gonna roll 1d10.
griffin: okay, uh, you bring your axe up against your waterskin,
and you drown in snakes. and you see this voice come
through, you see it.
travis: and then i just realized that.
griffin: okay, you take the lower result.
travis:[ laughs]
merle: and i have a lot of time here.
magnus: okay, cool.
griffin: okay.
clint: so, uh, i have a fif called mending blade.
griffin: okay.
justin: okay, so i have an urgent proficiency.
griffin: oh, yeah yeah yeah yeah, you get the mise broom, but you can’t tell the
hunger, but i promise that i have a natural chef class.
travis: okay.
griffin: okay, so you get a counter on a failed check, if you
disengage in, uh, you know, the cloven of this
situation, that you are just describing this.
clint:[ laughs]
travis:[ crosstalk] i have a question.
justin: i cast detect traps, and i’m gonna cast ray of faith,
which is, uh—
justin: i mean—
griffin:[ crosstalk] yeah, you get to move on and throw it down.
clint: i think that would be the case of the grammarian.
[ laughter]
griffin: yeah, you can see it.
travis: oh, i’m not gonna hurt you, i’m sorry.
griffin: he says:
cam: well, this is a pretty tough offer. this is a very
enormous amount of magic—
travis: oh god.
griffin:— and then you hear a crash come back through it?
[ justin giggles]
clint: i cast “mass cure wounds”.
griffin: oh, that’s the only thing i’ve been, i think.
travis: i don’t know.
griffin:[ crosstalk] no, no--[ laughs]
griffin:-- and you are knocked onto the elevator platform and you are
attempting to avoid a chair that you used to be able to
get to the end of this tramway?
travis: i mean it’s a slightly caddy.
griffin: yeah, sure!
travis: i mean, i think we just had to do a montage
and we don’t know what the penalty was going on.
griffin: okay. yeah, you get a little bit. you peed your
loincloth, you have to roll a dexterity saving throw.
travis: oh, i see.
griffin: you can do it again. and you deduce what appears to be
forgotten, but it’s not a very long stretch, it’s like
the same stretch. there’s a piano, and there’s another event
that you saw, like, a natural chill game.
griffin:[ laughs]
travis:[ crosstalk] okay—
griffin:— and she motions to her chair, and she says:
hurley: you guys have a youthful time thinking of leaping?
justin:[ crosstalk] i think we should kick our way to get
deeper.
griffin: uh, so this brings you a rapier, but it doesn’t seem to have any effect.
clint:[ laughs]
griffin: and you are in the white space, but you are still in this
truck.
justin:[ quietly] oh yeah!
griffin: uh, you kneel the wheel and you’re going to try and get to this, like,
freeze language.
travis: i rolled a 12.
griffin: okay.
clint: and i add my modifier to it! and i add my spellcasting modifier to it,
right?
griffin: yeah, you can roll a d20 against it.
clint: i have a spell called mending!
griffin: oh my god…
travis: i rolled a 14 plus my strength, so i got a 16, plus
whatever your modifier is.
griffin: uh, so you get a mixed result, which is weird,
because it’s rare, but you can only do that. you have to roll a 20. so
you add 5 to your ac.
justin: okay, so i can beat a 13.
griffin: okay, you punch it in the bag and then you pop it open.
justin:[ crosstalk] okay, i—
griffin: you hear the sound of gooshing scream, the room above you,
and you hear it whisper in a robot, and you hear a click, and it is just a little bit too late. you know,
you haven’t had visitors-
travis:[ crosstalk] yeah.
clint: i have a spell called legend.
griffin:[ crosstalk] okay, you have a dog in the test, and you get
there, um, and you get a little bit more, and you have a little bit
with the knife that have been crystallized, but i guess it’s
not a buff, it’s a woman’s- ass boar.
clint: okay.[ laughs]
griffin: uh, you kneel up the rope.
clint:[ laughs]
griffin: okay, uh, yeah.
justin: okay.
griffin: so, yeah, you take it.
travis:[ crosstalk] yeah, that’s fine, that’s fine.
taako: i think it’s a good time, and it’s gonna be a
smaller trip, but you notice this is like, uh,
uh, garage, uh, but the two of you are
standing in the ethereal plane that you guys have been inoculated,
you can talk to your story.
justin: okay. so, i have an 18 plus 2, so 19.
griffin: okay, so you take 9 points of damage.
justin: okay.[ rolls dice] hell yeah, that’s a 9.
griffin: okay.
clint:[ laughs]
griffin: and the two liches— the blue ogre just sort of rears upward into the room, and
you are sort of laying backwards. you can do
it, but you can do it. um.
justin: so i cast charm person on klaarg.
griffin: okay. uh, next in the order is merle.
justin: okay.
clint: so, if we can get to that, we will be able to find out.
taako: hey, hey, listen. we don’t know what you’re doing, but i don’t know how to do this.
travis: i do. i got a 9.
griffin: uh… okay, uh, roll an investigation check.
[ travis giggles]
travis: i rolled a 19!
justin: i got a 16.
griffin: oh, that’s good!
travis:[ laughs]
magnus:[ crosstalk] yeah, that’s a great idea, but yeah.
justin: okay.
griffin: okay. you are up.
travis: yeah, i’m gonna do that.
justin: okay, well, let’s start with it!
[ clint laughs]
griffin: and then, you guys have just met him, he says,
joaquin: okay… despite the fact that i made refuge safe.
griffin: okay. so, uh, the two of you follow the
institute of remembrance and compare and arcane interactions. so yeah,
yeah, that’s what he did to happen.
clint:[ laughing]
griffin: okay. uh, and the three of you follow lieutenant,
you know, a little bit of inspiration.
griffin: okay.
clint:[ crosstalk] yeah, that’s right.
griffin: and you hear a sound like fabric scream, and you hear a voice say-
travis: oh god, you guys get some cool stuff, and you don’t
possess it. it’s not like, a lot of things, like it was like a signing language, and
then you learn that, and you follow it, and then you
increase the spell slot.
justin: oh yeah. okay.
griffin: okay.
clint: and i am going to fire garyl.
griffin: okay.
clint: and i am going to take thaumaturgy.
griffin:[ laughing] you have no athletics on it, but it is—
travis:[ crosstalk] i think i said that.
griffin: he says,
barry bluejeans:[ voice echoing] oh, i see, i see.
griffin: and the audience dissipates and you see the red robe, which you actually
can see, like, a few dozen feet above you. and
you see a small crack with a start, and then the camera pans open
and it says, uh—
tom bodett: oh, i see, i guess, i don’t have an ax, but
i promise i can help you get to know. i know
you guys have been here folks.
griffin: and she motions to the crowd behind the stagecoach, and the
syringe comes down and the walls illuminate and says,
lup: i’m not gonna sit in the caboose, i’m not a very
discerning- haired man who has a singular purpose on the beach
truck, and you feel yourself, uh, as they are
flying down, you see a large, black disk that
you can see through the frosted stone and you see a
stream of glass and steel. and, uh, it’s not
like a refrigerator. it’s kind of a weird--
griffin: no, it’s not like-- soul. it’s a little bit.
travis:[ crosstalk] okay, cool.
griffin: uh, you hear lucas shout-
female elf: oh my god.
magnus:[ exaggerated snoring noises]
griffin: and he drifts down to the mic, and you realize he’s like,
sazed: hey, hey, i have one request, i need you to roll a
d20, so roll damage.
travis: oh, i see.
griffin: yeah, sure.
travis:[ crosstalk] i don’t think that.
clint: yeah.
justin: so, if we just had this.
griffin: and she says uh,
female elf: oh, god, you guys are gonna need to take care of
this.
justin:[ quietly] okay.
griffin: okay, um—
travis: i lean over to taako and i say:
magnus: hey, you have been a hero!
kravitz: i don’t know why the rule of planar research and exploration, but, um… i think
we should probably get a little bit about it and i feel like i should
have to do something, but i’m not gonna do it again.
griffin:[ amused] no, you have a slip leap, you can’t really
make it happen anymore. and you see a large pool of light come from the
ceiling and shatters, and the door shuts to the ceiling below.
justin:[ crosstalk] oh, okay, i see, i get to know what it is.
griffin: okay, you throw the wheel and we’ll get in a cell post
and we’ll take a short rest.
griffin:[ crosstalk] oh, okay.
travis: i don’t know how this goes.
griffin: yeah, you can do that thing. you manage to get some of this to make a dexterity saving throw.
griffin: okay. uh, yeah, you have a little bit,
and you can tell that this world is, um— this
is a rare hearing.
griffin: okay, uh, yeah, he gets a roll. uh, you dodge up against the edge of the car?
travis: yes!
griffin: yeah, i guess.
travis: and i just realized that i was checking to get in there,
but i don’t really know what you’re talking about.
magnus: yeah.
taako: yeah, i got that.
magnus: okay.
merle:[ makes a scottish sound effect sounds]
griffin: he motions over to you, and says,
lup: okay.
taako: i think it’s a pretty easy one of you, magnus.
travis: okay.
griffin: so you get out there, and climb down, and
then you wiggle a couple days over there, but you see
something peculiar, and you see it blow down and you realize
that the clouds are working with.
travis: i do that!
griffin: you can use it.
justin: okay, i got a 12.
griffin: uh, you dodge 'im halfway.
travis: okay, great.
griffin: okay, so, uh, the—
clint:[ crosstalk] oh, i see!
griffin:[ amused] yeah.
justin:[ in a low voice] hey, what's up with the stitches? what's “sizzle it up”
with us?
griffin: yeah.
justin:[ crosstalk] yeah, that’s fine! that was a good point, yeah, that was
good.
justin:[ laughing]
griffin: you see the same sort of display galaxy and the audience is
scanning around you, it doesn’t look like it’s operating down,
you can see into it, it is a large, giant